So much of the conversation about personal branding focuses on being noticed. Whether it’s creating a blog or maintaining a great personal style – much is said about the need to stand out among the masses and make a great first impression.
I definitely don’t discount the importance of making a great first impression (after all, according to a University of Illinois study, it may take up to 21 interactions to undo a bad first impression); however, I always encourage my clients and the audiences I speak in front of to stop focusing on being noticed and instead focus on being remembered.
You may be wondering, “What’s the difference?” Being noticed gets you a business card. Being remembered gets you a returned phone call. As you develop your personal brand, your focus should be on creating ways to stay at the forefront of the minds of the individuals whom you’ve identified as valuable contacts.
KEEP READING IF THIS APPLIES TO YOU: You’ve identified the right contacts. You’ve managed to get their contact information and have reached out to them. Now you’re simply waiting for your phone to ring. Below are five potential reasons you haven’t heard back from them (and what to do about it).
1. You Tried To Get Married on the First Date
When you fail to properly establish a relationship, it is easy to move too fast too soon. We would all raise our eyebrows if someone proposed to us (ring and all) at the end of a first date. Why? Because we know the value of timing and the importance of investing in a relationship over time in order to be in a position to take things to a more serious level.
The same can be said for your relationships with the people in your network. Exchanging business cards isn’t a guarantee for business, a referral, a job, etc. Take the time to invest in the relationship and work your way up to the big ‘ask’.
2. You Failed to Manage Your Expectations
Making a leap and assuming that an employee at your dream employer is well connected or well respected within that organization could be problematic. If you approach them with the expectation that they are your ‘in’ to securing a job or business – you will likely be disappointed. Unless your key contact is a key decision maker or directly involved in the hiring process, they may be limited in what they can do for you.
Instead, adjust your expectations and treat them as an additional pair of hands involved in the project of building your career. The project does not live or die by their involvement but instead can be enhanced by it. Alleviate the pressure you might be placing on a contact and meet them where they are. Manage your expectations and let them help you where they feel most comfortable (believe me they’ll be better at it).
3. You Forgot About the Jerry Maguire Mandate
In the 1996 cult classic “Jerry Maguire”, sports agent extraordinaire Jerry Maguire (played by Tom Cruise) gets an ear full from his all flash/little substance client Rod Tidwell (played by Cuba Gooding Jr.) as Tidwell reminds him about what was most important to him – “Show me the money!!”
In order to get that sought after returned phone call, email or face-to-face meeting, you must be able to clearly articulate the value you add. How? You must show that individual or that organization that you solve a (real) problem that they have and that you solve it better (and not just cheaper) than anyone else. Effectively you must prove to them that they would miss out by not returning your phone call. Show them the value!!
4. You Ignored Non-Verbal Cues.
There are times in life when someone just isn’t interested. For whatever reason, they have no desire to buy what you’re selling. One can only hope that realization is made early on in a relationship allowing both parties to go their separate ways (the challenge occurs when a lot of time, energy or money are invested before arriving at that point).
Perhaps your audience has made it clear – using non-verbal cues – this is one of those instances. But unfortunately in your zeal to establish the relationship, you completely ignored those clues. Now you’re phone isn’t ringing and you’re not sure why.
Pay attention to whether they are reluctant to hand you a business card or seem very vague and evasive when asked about the proper time for a follow-up. For example, if you’re at a networking event and after meeting someone they fail to acknowledge for the rest of the night – there might be an issue. Listen with your eyes as well as your ears. Non-verbal signals may be telling you to move on.
5. Your Disappearing Act Rivals David Blaine’s.
If you’re genuinely stumped and can’t figure out why you haven’t heard back from that person you met a few weeks ago stop and ask yourself, “Am I consistently putting for the time and effort necessary to build this relationship?”
If you are sporadically reaching out to your network with no real rhyme or reason, you are making it extremely difficult to stay at the forefront of their minds. If you find yourself reaching out to them only when they have a job posting, when you want an introduction to someone in their network or simply too infrequently to have an impact – you’re probably sabotaging your own efforts.
You shouldn’t be popping up and appearing when you need something and then disappearing not to be heard from again. There must be a method do your madness. Use your Outlook® calendar for reminders well into the future. Or, create a spreadsheet listing your most valuable contacts and track how often you reach out to them and the results of that contact. You may find that you’re spending too much time on some relationships and not enough time on others. Be strategic and ensure that you are consistently staying on the radars of the power players in your network. Retire the “Now you see me; now you don’t” routine.
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